I did the test several times and had varying results (ISTJ - Examiner, INFJ - Confidant and ISFJ - Defender). That was reason for me to investigate further and I started to look at the patterns in total and the percentages in the scores. It seems there is a common theme for being an 'introvert' and 'judging'.
I am not convinced that I am actually an introvert although I currently behave like one. It seems that I am actually a scared extrovert acting out of fear of being rejected and fear of being judged by others. If I would be more extrovert, that would be quite a shift in who I am and can be !
I read a bit more on the Judging vs Perceiving and the characteristics that go with such people and frankly Perceiving fits me better in many ways. I think I need to be Decisive, Controlled, Organized, Structured and Responsible since I have labels saying that is 'Good' and how I should be, it is how I get things done and more a survival mechanism. Feeling no focus in life (working on that) I am quite sure many answers I gave in those tests were based on what I think I should do, not on what I actually do. In real life I much more a Perceiving person (e.g. Disorganized, Changes tracks midway, Procrastinates, Dislikes routine).
The last few days I did a lot of reading on Steve's site and forums and I am starting to questioning the fears that are holding me back and the destructive believes I have. I am not convinced that doing those tests now, will not result in who I actually am or can be, because I feel I am a vague shadow of my potential.
But the those tests did give me even more reasons to question my current context and believes and continue to work on finding my purpose. It has been quite a ride so far !
Bart
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