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Originally Posted by MyBrainHurts  I think you guys are missing my point, and from what I have observed and experienced, there is no greater happiness in life then when you are in romantic love. I have never seen a (single person) that was as happy as a person that is in love, period. And I was attacking the root of the problem that fact that shes ends up with guys that treat her like that. If you tell her how to deal with the dirt bag guy without first telling her how to not end up with one in the first place its seems pretty inevitable that she will end up right back in the same place or in even worse shape (accepting the situation).
I think I may be horribly misunderstood by everyone but hey im used to it! |
Well, that may be true, but the happiness brought about by strong romantic love is not a safe happiness. The base of a person's consciousness should be happy, content, and accepting, innately. If it depends on another person, so much can go wrong. You seem to have left out a little tidbit to do with romantic love, something that I know all too well from experience: The lows. Oh, the sorrowful, pitiful, depressing, intense lows that strong love can bring about! With the euphoric, heavenly peaks of intense happiness and love, comes those ghastly lows.
You seem to think Riorose's happiness should depend on external things, the people around her, her romantic relationships, and so on. This is simply not true. Happiness is a state of mind, and as such, it depends on the mind and the mind only and is far easier to obtain via changing your thoughts than it is by any other means.
It's like this: Imagine there is a criteria for happiness that is in your brain. This criteria must be met for a person to attain contentment. There are two ways to do it:
1. Change the universe (your surroundings) so that it matches your mind's criteria.
2. Change your mind's criteria so that it matches your surroundings.
Option one requires for you to do something that is borderline impossible, requires substantial effort, and takes more than a lifetime in many cases. Option two technically has no obstacles. Depending on the person, their world view, experiences, level of intelligence, and many other things, it could take 10 seconds or it could take 100 years.
You might say, "but that's terrible. If a person can be happy in any circumstance, what if their circumstances are very bad?" Well, being content doesn't mean losing your common sense. For example, Riorose, even if she was happy, probably wouldn't want to stay with that scum guy. It would be stupid; he lied to her, insulted her, and generally was a jerk to her, so why should she hang around? Her happiness doesn't depend on him, or anything for that matter, she's free to do whatever she wants.