come to Europe yossarian, we nice compassionate europeans will cheer you up
But seriously, there is something in your post that makes me frown. It's that the way they treat you hurts you. They can only hurt you if you allow that. What they say or how they behave can only affect you if it resonates with something that you think about yourself inside of you.
Example: in the past I felt bad about being overweight. I thought my body was perfectly ok the way it was, and I had no problem with being like I was... but still, secretly I had half subconscious thoughts like "fat is ugly" or "nobody finds such a fat girl sexy". When someone said something about being fat to me, it used to hurt like hell! Because for a millisecond I had thought "yeah that's true..."
Now imagine some person telling you "yossarian, haha, that's ridiculous, your black hair!" (let's assume you have no black hair) Wouldn't you think "huh? what's up with him, I have no black hair, and why is black hair ridiculous?" Would that hurt you? Probably not! You would be baffled, but not hurt. What I'm trying to say is that if what they say resonates with
nothing inside of you, it can't hurt you.
That's why I think that the reason why their behaviour/judgements have the power to hurt you is that you have such judging/harsh thoughts about yourself in your head. Maybe not consciously, but you could try to find out if subconsciously you don't think yourself all these bad things you told us others think about you or generally shy boys? Isn't there a little voice telling you that you're not a real man, or that you're worthless, or that you're a wimp, or that you'll never get a girl...?
Don't give them power over you. They have only as much power as you give them, with your inner voice. Transform this inner voice in a supporting, friendly, unconditionally loving voice! Your thoughts are terribly important.
I can already tell you that the thoughts you have about women will lead you to a lot of crap, but not to where you want to be
