When I fall in love, I don't just fall in love with the person, I fall in love with everything and everyone. It is like this person has opened up the floodgates to a powerful river. If I'm dumped the valve is obstructed, I still love my family and friends, but I end up beached and disconnected to that great flowing love. So, I do not think it is necessarily the person that is mourned, but more the connection to love. If I fall out of love, I'm still on the river, but the flow has lost its momentum.
I think the ego also plays a part, especially with suffering and bitterness towards the dumper or not wanting to let go.
|