You talk about the common "what if's", but to be honest I almost never have these moments. Also you are making the assumption (like 99% of humanity does) that you know what would have been best, or what would probably have happened.
You write that you lost out on a possibly relationship with Sharon. Who says you lost on it? Maybe they were about to ridicule you for the whole school and cause you a lot of pain (not to mention that pain is not always "bad"). Or you could have ended up marrying and being in an unhappy marriage for the rest of your life.
I can go on forever.... As there are positive possibly results there are also negative ones. The assumption that we seem to know what would have happened if we did not do a certain thing, causes us to suffer. It's one of the most arrogant things we can actually do. Thinking we know what would be best for us AND for others. (Think of people always trying to "save" the world and the poor africans, who says they WANT to be saved??)
As I'm a firm believer that everything in our lives are as they should be, I see your shyness as something that you needed. Because of your shyness you now have the firm belief of not letting shyness rule you anymore. Often the things we had in our past, were the keys that transformed us to take control in those area's.  |