Monday morning, 7:22. I've lay in bed for hours not being able to sleep. I had to get up and write this. I'm 19 years young guy just for the reference.
What I want to know is...
How can I know if I piss someone off or bother them in some way if they don't tell me? This is what I think might be the case in two of my social circles. I value friendships with others a lot. I subscribe to the old "Your communication is the response you get" and I like to take on responsibility on how I cause people to respond to me.
I understand it's not always me, everyone has blindspots and things they do but I don't want to just keep "silent problems" silent (even though I do), I want to fix things or at least be aware of them so they don't come up again.
I don't beat myself up about it either, I will sometimes just say "whatever, tomorrow they will be fine" and sometimes they are.
I know we all have problems but surely there's people with extremely healthy relationships out there.
Kind of how Tony Robbins does a seminar where a couple feel like getting a divorce and he gets the woman shouting and blaming him. The husband has to stand there and take it and know in the moment that the love he has for her is powerful. He just has to "be present" and listen to her. Even though she does everythign in her power to push him away.
You could just "move on" and leave her because she's acting like that or you can take responsibility.
It's like that but in a friendship sense. I want to take responsibility and fix silly problems instead of just saying "whatever, it's their issue".
I want to be the one that my friends love to be around and love talking to. If there's a problem or something pissing them off how can I get them to tell me. Especially if I'm the one bothering them somehow.
I'm going to ask one of my friends if I was "being a dick" to him when I get chance today. Instead of blaming or accusing him. I've known this guy for a very long time. I just wanna improve my friendships.
Please help. Thanks
