Eight years you've been doing this -- and you think the reason is that he has is terrified of commitment, can't hack it, is immature, insecure, and selfish?
Marian, you're issue has absolutely nothing -- zero -- to do with this guy, and is 100% your responsibility. This is all about eight years of your choices.
Eight years is a looooooong time, mama. How long are you going to keep your life on hold, hoping another person changes? When will you be ready to look at how you are being, and what the results have been of that?
You can build a life you're in love with if you want to -- do you want to?
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