Sysiphus2, you have made the mistake of hearing us say blame when in fact we are talking about responsibility. Blaming and taking responsibility are two entirely different things, of course.
When you're being blaming, you're completely powerless. And when you are taking 100% responsibility, you have all the power in the world to generate a life you're in love with.
As I've mentioned, it looks like you've chosen a partner who is not willing to make your well being -- or even his own! -- a priority. You have taken that to the extreme of "If it wasn't for me, he would die." So now you have taken on the responsibility not only for his well-being, but actually for his EXISTENCE! That is not a partnership, my dear. I am not saying anything is your fault; I am saying that until you take 100% responsibility for the life you find yourself leading, you are 100% powerless to change it, and to create a life you love.
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