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Originally Posted by Natsu  Bah, don't pay me much attention. Maybe it's just coincidence. I don't hate this job that much. I can do some drawings and get paid for it... still, supposedly, if I could stay fifty years working here I should count myself lucky, everyone says. And yet the prospect of spending three more years here gives me shudders... to think of retiring in this job is scary. I sometimes feel like screaming "I want out!" So I must be doing something wrong. |
You were speaking your truth up until that last paragraph. You're experiencing a 1 on a scale of 1 to 10, trying to convince yourself that it's really a 7 and that maybe a 7 isn't so bad. Better to accept a 1 as a 1 and then focus on building the strength and courage to go after the 9 or 10 you really want.
It's great you're experiencing setbacks on the wrong path -- that's far better than going numb. The setbacks will continue to occur until you start cooperating with your higher purpose instead of fighting/ignoring it. The more setbacks you have, the stronger and clearer your desire for what you want will become.
You might find some of the concepts in this older article helpful:
http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/200...rker-syndrome/
And of course your situation is very similar to the one in this article:
http://www.stevepavlina.com/articles...onsciously.htm