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september · 11-23-2007, 07:23 AM

The members of the forums here seem like some of the most hopeful and spiritually aware people I've encountered... well... on the Internet! So I thought I'd stop by and see if there was any advice you all could offer me.

For years and years I've been trying to establish some kind of real spiritual connection... praying didn't work. I eventually became an atheist. Attempting to meditate and speak with whomever might speak to me... didn't work. I end up creating conversations with myself, believing that perhaps the words might actually be coming from another source, but in the end, these efforts fizzle off into nothing. I was an avid fan of psipog while it was active, and spent an hour a day for weeks at a time trying to coax my psiwheel around, focusing and unfocusing my vision in attempts to reveal the colors of my aura, and meditating in attempts to clear my mind of crap to achieve these things. I have failed... without fail.

I feel like I'm spiritually dead, but an unflagging flame within my brain makes me want to continue searching. But how can I establish any kind of meaningful connection to lead me in a more fulfilling direction for my life? I'm current a student who feels pretty aimless and depressed. I feel cut off and very unaware. This is with understanding of the principles of subjective reality, openness to the Law of Attraction and definite openness to hearing from any kind of guide or my higher self. That hearing, that concrete evidence would represent for me a real step forward - something I can put my roots into and grow from. I feel so shallow currently, like I'm trying, but my power of doubt seems to overwhelm every time (I'm a philosophy undergrad trained in the analytical tradition, which draws aggressively from sentential and predicate logic and the power of discrimination in reasoning).

I've read through Steve and Erin's articles. Almost all of them. I'm very thorough (though my memory's not perfect). But I still feel empty and overwhelmed. Let me cast out my intention: I intend, with open arms, to bring spiritual help and direction into my life, from whatever direction it presents itself. Obviously, I came here with the intention that I could get some help from this forum, but I want to remain open to it from any direction.

11-23-2007, 07:23 AM	#1 (permalink)
september Member Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: IL Posts: 83	spiritually dead? The members of the forums here seem like some of the most hopeful and spiritually aware people I've encountered... well... on the Internet! So I thought I'd stop by and see if there was any advice you all could offer me. For years and years I've been trying to establish some kind of real spiritual connection... praying didn't work. I eventually became an atheist. Attempting to meditate and speak with whomever might speak to me... didn't work. I end up creating conversations with myself, believing that perhaps the words might actually be coming from another source, but in the end, these efforts fizzle off into nothing. I was an avid fan of psipog while it was active, and spent an hour a day for weeks at a time trying to coax my psiwheel around, focusing and unfocusing my vision in attempts to reveal the colors of my aura, and meditating in attempts to clear my mind of crap to achieve these things. I have failed... without fail. I feel like I'm spiritually dead, but an unflagging flame within my brain makes me want to continue searching. But how can I establish any kind of meaningful connection to lead me in a more fulfilling direction for my life? I'm current a student who feels pretty aimless and depressed. I feel cut off and very unaware. This is with understanding of the principles of subjective reality, openness to the Law of Attraction and definite openness to hearing from any kind of guide or my higher self. That hearing, that concrete evidence would represent for me a real step forward - something I can put my roots into and grow from. I feel so shallow currently, like I'm trying, but my power of doubt seems to overwhelm every time (I'm a philosophy undergrad trained in the analytical tradition, which draws aggressively from sentential and predicate logic and the power of discrimination in reasoning). I've read through Steve and Erin's articles. Almost all of them. I'm very thorough (though my memory's not perfect). But I still feel empty and overwhelmed. Let me cast out my intention: I intend, with open arms, to bring spiritual help and direction into my life, from whatever direction it presents itself. Obviously, I came here with the intention that I could get some help from this forum, but I want to remain open to it from any direction.