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Originally Posted by Steve Pavlina  Quote: |
Originally Posted by Rose of Cairo Thanks for the article, Steve. Very synchronistic
Everyone around me is pressuring me into getting a job based on my skills, whereas I'm just sitting here, reading a lot and thinking about what my purpose could be and what I'd like to express. They think I'm being totally lazy, so thanks for the confirmation that my approach isn't that dumb
Unfortunately I haven't found it out yet. | It sounds like you're in a position where you could have a lot of fun with people who want to control you... by twisting the proverbial blade that's making them so uncomfortable.  |
Rose, and anyone else who is in a comparable position, as a fellow traveller on the journey and someone who is in a very similar situation to what you describe, I wanted to share some advice and personal experiences in hopes that you can benefit. If I could go back in time using a time machine and tell myself a few things, these would be some of the things I mention.
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Things to watch for when “twisting the proverbial blade”
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If the proverbial “make the unconscious people squirm with the light of your awareness” blade came with a disclaimer, it would be:
You must be highly conscious and aware while using this implement. Can cause loss of consciousness. Batteries not included.
While I can certainly appreciate the fun that Steve mentions (I have a fair bit of it myself
), be careful your “fun” doesn’t become a vortex that sucks you into unconsciousness. I’m not sure if you’re familiar with the works of
Eckhart Tolle and other in-depth coverage of “the ego”, awareness, the present moment, “flow”, etc, but Steve’s statement very much assumes that you are relatively clear, conscious and aware at the time said “fun” is taking place.
It may be true that your thinking and actions are more conscious, deliberate, and present-focused then others, but I know from my personal experience that it’s all too easy to unconsciously identify with your supposedly “high awareness” position such that it becomes a gateway into the very thing you’re trying to avoid.
How to spot when you drop the figurative "awareness" ball
People will tend to react to you the same regardless of what state you are in (ie. if they resist you, they’ll resist you; if they laugh and agree, they’ll laugh and agree)), but I find that when I slip into a lower level of consciousness and begin to identify with your thinking, it’s easy to spot it based on my actions (or reactions), or, failing that, the wake of subtle “destruction” (or should that be “disruption”?) I leave in my wake.
For example, when I am reasonably present and aware, I’m very calm, content, and non-reactive. I find I don’t start drama, nor do I continue it, and should I choose to poke fun at someone (which, when extremely present, I usually don’t do because I find silence -- or simply “being” -- to be more effective and reasonable), there is never any maliciousness, and any reaction people have is completely there own.
On the other hand, when I’m slipping awareness-wise (read: which is most of the time
), a sort of haze comes over me. I have a very direct and honest nature and can begin to misuse that, often reacting to people and/or circumstances, unintentionally doing or saying things that indirectly resist the present moment and function as avoidance behaviours, and/or attempting to strengthen my sense of self, usually through subtle (and very unintentional, unconscious) diminishment of others.
Often it takes a bit of damage and a growing sense of resistance to knock me out of this state and “wake me up”, and while such a wake up call is always welcome, I much prefer to catch such things before they have the chance to directly impact others. Knowledge of what happens when intelligence is coupled with a lack of awareness (ie. "intelligence in the service of madness", to quote Eckhart Tolle) can help with this, as can constant, non-judgemental observation of your internal state.
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Staying true to your internal compass
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Nothing feels better then listening to that inner guidance and doing exactly what feels right for you, regardless of what those around you are saying. Heck, if I listened to those around me, instead of discovering what is truly meaningful to me and aligning my life with that, I’d probably have a 9-5 job right now, complaining about how others make my life unpleasant, and spending all of my “spare time” trying to escape from the demoralising experience I call my “life” (did I paint a grim enough picture? If not, throw in some post-apocalyptic type landscapes and dreary colour hues for effect.
)
That said, be weary of getting too comfortable with someone else confirming that you're on the right track. What I'm saying here is not that you should question yourself or other people, but rather that you should make use of the valuable feedback you receive in the form of emotional guidance relative to desires (whether they are conscious desires or not) while being able to see what others tell you in the right context – regardless if what they say is supporting or not.
Realise that while certain people are telling you to do one thing, Steve is essentially another one of those people, and regardless of his vast experience and knowledge, only you can know if you're truly on the right path, or whether you only think you are, but are actually starting to diverge a little bit.
This may or may not be useful to you or not, but I had to get off course (even when I thought I was doing great!) before I learnt that it's easy to lose sight of your goal. This is especially true when your goal is not yet known, and the only thing you have to guide you are concepts of purpose, self-expression, and emotional resonance.
How to apply this abstract concept to real life
As for specific ways to ensure you stay on course, the best thing I find you can do is to bring a light... the light of your awareness, that is. (I rate that last sentence a 7 on the cliché scale
) I find the only way to stay on course effectively is to pay attention to the subtle emotional feedback you get when you do something, as well as the larger, more pervasive feeling of “this does/does not feel right” that seems to never leave me, but can be temporarily obscured. This requires that I maintain a high degree of awareness, and when it comes to that, Eckhart Tolle is a better teacher then I am, and I cannot recommend his books
A New Earth and
The Power of Now highly enough. They serve as an excellent supplement to Steve’s writing, and gave me a whole new understanding as to how Steve is able to experience a constant state of joy and why his life seems so cooperative.
On a final note, I'll add one more thing:
Don't be too afraid to go off course. This may seem like it contradicts what I said above, but it actually reinforces it. Often I'll feel an urge to do something that, logically, doesn't make much sense at all. It's only after I've done it that I realise that it wasn't bad at all, and it's almost as if things were meant to happen that way. I wouldn't advise blatant recklessness, but realise that the same delusional thinking that can make you think that you're on the right course can also make you think that you're diverging off course when you're really only taking a short cut.