I can certainly relate as well, although I find myself not really giving too much advice about the hard stuff. I usually just let other people do that because they seem to be better at it than I am anyway!
I also know, intellectually, what the "right" thing to do is in most situations, (that's probably our intuition leading us), but often do the thing that I have been conditioned to do instead (with the conditioning being out of fear).
I think that you are on the right track though, because you truly seem to care about other people and yourself, and you also seem to desire a healthy life for yourself and for others, and these are great qualities to have. I can't imagine that you won't have a chance for another try at a great relationship soon! Good luck!
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