Quote:
Originally Posted by Chado2423  I have been unhappy for a very long time. I'm still unhappy, and I'm not sure all of the reasons why. Is there like some sort of formula you can utilize to make yourself happy, and no, sorry NLP and EFT doesn;t work for me. I'm talking about real changes in my life. |
The answer is in your question:
"Why am I still unhappy?", written another way "I am still unhappy, why?"
You've already decided you are unhappy, and now you are looking for proof. You probably already have a lot of proof that you are unhappy, your upbringing/past, your family/friends/peers, your job/work, and you probably have lots of reasons why you are unhappy.
All of that has nothing to do with the fact that you are unhappy, only your views do. It's very hard to become happy when you are still unhappy. It's completely incompatible. The way you think about everything in your life is what mood you end up with. If you think unhappy, you will be unhappy.
The only way to become happy is to stop focusing on thinking you are unhappy, and start focusing on thinking you are happy. Increase those things in your life that you consider make you happy, and decrease those that don't.
As for the idea that "ignoring the problem won't make it go away", you are right, but this is the focus of your attention. You can still have a problem and work on fixing it, but if you aren't working on it, and thinking about it makes you unhappy, don't think about it! Just like if you have your hand on a hot stove and it would get burnt, you don't then ignore the stove, you just remember that it hurts and appropriately keep your hand off it. If thinking about something makes you unhappy, stop thinking about it.
This does work, even if it may sound silly, but putting it into practice is hard, and it takes a while to shift focus. It may take a year to go from unhappy to happy, but if after a year you are happy for the rest of your life, then it was worth it. Anything that is worth it takes time.
I hope you've seen something for yourself out of this, even if it was a little forthright.