I think I understand you alright, joyjoy. He has told you that your relationship is over, and he even used very strong words to get you to accept that when you apparently ignored or disregarded what he was saying to you in no uncertain terms. It is over.
Trying to manipulate the situation by declaring that you will be a whole new person, starting fresh with him, is wily but dishonest. (At the same time you're saying you want to be the girl he was crazy about before -- that's not so fresh, is it?)
He has asked you, joyjoy, to leave him alone, and you seem only willing to give him that as long as you can hold on to your plan to accost him again. You are intentionally disregarding his request that you leave him alone -- you're just biding your time till you can strike again in six months. What's wrong with that? Aside from it getting in the way of his freedom and your ability to build your own life into something worth living, it could also be considered to be against the law. If you were to approach him after he has asked you several times to stay away, he could get a restraining order and even have you put in jail.
Do you understand that if someone asks you to leave them alone, the best thing (for everybody!) is to honor that request? Forever!
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