I think that a lot of people act like children, and expect their romantic partner to be the parent.
In every other area of my life, I'm mature and reasonable. But in romantic relationship, I regress into a 2-year-old child. I throw tantrums, act bratty, and in general become a handful. And I expect my partner to be unconditionally patient and loving...like a parent.
Maybe a lot of smart, strong, successful women grew up with critical, absent, or unsupportive parents. They were deprived of emotional safety. I've spent my life trying to be noticed: I had more ambition, more flash, more "strength" than many other women. I wanted to prove to society that I was worth something, even if my parents didn't think so.
Unfortunately, that feeling of deprivation really comes out in relationships. It's like my heart has all these holes, and no matter how much love is poured in, it all leaks out. Bottomless pit.
I really want to grow up now. Right now, I feel like no one will love me unless I'm really beautiful, really successful, etc.. So, I pursue these things, not to complement who I am...but to compensate for who I think I'm not.
I would envy these girls, who weren't nearly as pretty or successful as me, but they would have boyfriends who adored them. I always wondered why. Now I know.
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