Quote:
Originally Posted by Tigerlilly I believe the more you feel unity with other people at a core level the more the fear of being different from them on a superficial level vanishes. But you can't escape being hurt by some responses to you until you reach that place where you feel such unity with all others that they are you, and that I consider some task. But I believe also that the nearer you're getting the more these hurts become simple fleshwounds you can handle, like cutting your finger.
And I believe only the ego sets standards for experience to measure people with it and it's only the ego speaking when it tries to evaluate itself by putting others down. And it's your own ego playing along with the others when it accepts this positioning and makes you feel rotten.
We're so often told by wise people not to be afraid to share ourselves with others and life, that our value is untouchable, I guess it's just one of these truths that take getting there in person to be able to fully believe in them.  |
Thanks for replying. I think it really is a fear of rejection. One time I made a post to another forum about college kids, anyway I expressed my opinion on the subject and left it at that. Later on I went to check if anyone had replied, I started to get nervous of what would people think of me and my post. Would they think me insensitive? Naive? Out of touch? Before long I was bouncing around with anxiety and thinking matching out-of-control thoughts,
'what if they kick me out?' 'what if they hate me?', etc. etc. I simply had to check.
So I did, and someone didn't agree with me. I was not happy but it was nothing as bad as my out of control thoughts predicted it would be. I still felt insecure, the person had good points and I suddenly felt self-conscious and naive.
You see I hate that rollercoaster of emotion. I feel okay now. But I just loathe it. So I would love to get to that place where being wrong, failing or being disagreed with is just a flesh wound.
I think for people who haven't yet reached a stage of 'greatness' (for lack of a much better word), like myself, it is easy to equate yours with you and to see being wrong or being disagreed likened to rejection. Although it isn't. Still it's a huge mind hurdle to cross/comprehend, and really comprehend.