Hi there smallstar, glad to hear we're in the same wavelength.
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Originally Posted by smallstar  Having discussed this with my wife, I think she would still need some "adjustment" in order to agree with this... of course it is easier in the beginning of a relationship, but I didn't think it as important then. Hopefully, the worst I'll be getting now is reciprocity, which would be actually interesting...  |
It's dangerous grounds to "become alpha" while in a relationship, because your partner will always oppose the change. It's not specifical to girlfriends or wives, it's just because people have expectations from other people and they don't want to change that perception. For instance when you start becoming more alpha even your guy friends will try to "put you back in your place", simply because you're challenging the status quo.
So expect a lot of Congruence Tests from your wife on this. It's normal situation. And I wouldn't start radically by approaching random women on bars and clubs, you could for instance start seducing your wife again: bust her playfully, play push/pull, learn to elicit her values, learn to communicate at an emotional level, to feed her rich descriptions, play with her some psychological games, dress better, learn new moves in bed and so on.
Once you get a feeling at what works and what doesn't with your wife, you can start playfully pushpulling other women in semi-public places. For instance if I'm in a restaurant with my gf I always flirt with the waitresses. I'm not actively picking them up, just busting their balls a little, and making them giggle. Basically every girl that has a job where she has to deal with clients will welcome a light-hearted ballbusting, since the majority of her clients usually will be boring or worse, rude, so you're a welcome change. Much easier than girls in clubs who are expecting lots of guys to compliment and entertain them. And since you're with your wife, you don't activate their "OMG he's trying to pick me up" radar.
At some point much later if your wife is *very* open-minded you might try to actively seduce other women. But that will of course depend on the nature of your relationship. She might perceive this as an attack on her value as a woman. So you must tread carefully here. She being sexually interested in other women helps a lot, but finding a woman interested in these kind of sexual experimentation is rare (though not impossible), and even then a lot of feelings come into play and you might hurt her feelings still. You have to frame it like you're both experimenting something new together, or else she will feel left behind.