What a moving experience. Normally inspiration reigns over me after I've read a Steve Pavlina article; but this experience was unique. It resonated with me to the point where I suddenly found myself in tears, around the part where Steve starts talking about joy without the money, talent or contribution. I'm quite a sensitive, empathic person usually but I never thought I would cry over 'just' a podcast.
It was an unusual crying experience i.e. I wasn't crying because I was sad. Whilst I was crying I didn't have any sad thoughts. In fact, I remember thinking to myself, "This is really odd. Why am I suddenly crying? My life is pretty good at the moment.". I couldn't help it. I think the act of crying was actually my true self yearning to be in balance in the four quadrants.
The podcast really made me think about what I'm doing (University student studying for a Computer Science degree), and why I'm doing it. I don't know for certain yet what my true values are, I just know that this podcast has made me realise that I don't want to go into a career where I'm motivated solely by money. Its clear to me that I need to discover what my personal values are but I don't know how. I'm worried that if I don't clarify what my heart really wants, and soon, then I'll just end up numbing the experience out and forgetting its yearning.
One odd thing I noticed: normally when I'm listening to an audio file, especially a spoken podcast, during the podcast, something triggers off a thought. During the moments when this thought is running through my mind, I find that I can concentrate only on that thought; Its like inside my head the audio file's volume has been turned down and my thought volume turned to max. This happens in a lot of scenarios like working whilst listening to music, listening to other audio programs, when watching tv etc. However, during this podcast I found myself again thinking about other things but oddly I realised that I was, at the same time, still able to completely listen and take in every word that Steve was saying.  |