Just wondering any of the rest of you ever sometimes find that hanging out someone else, including a loved/adored significant other (or close friend I suppose as well), can be just draining at times? I don't mean it in a negative way toward them, but in that I'm just one of those strange types who often genuinely needs to be left alone, and don't think my girlfriend actually understands this. She tends to think something is wrong between us or some such, case in point being tonight, she wants to get together and I just don't want to hang out with anyone. I've spent the last week helping a close friend move, spending almost 3 whole days with him, and spent a couple of those nights with my girlfriend as well, and those days were fun and enjoyed (well, as much as moving can be) but tonight the idea of being around anyone is just making me cringe.
I hate it because she always sounds disappointed (she's one of those always-social types- we're very different in many waysand it creates some wild chemistry between us
) and I hate it because I don't want to hurt her feelings, but generally just relegate it to thinking "Oh well, I'll just have to be an ass tonight in her eyes" and do my own thing- that's one thing my only child loner self has never had an issue with
Any ideas on how to get this point across besides just saying it, which I've done (no offense to the women out there, but in my experience, with most of them, "direct approach" just doesn't seem to work either way- not when given by me, and they generally don't know how to do it themselves and go with "hinting" instead, which no man on earth has ever understood)? "I just need time to myself more often than most people do" seems to just baffle her, but I guess to her it would sound like someone saying to me that they "just need to stand in a dark closet and say the ABCs backward", which just wouldn't make any sense to me and I'd just think it was silly... I don't think "draining" would be the best word of description to use with her though
Sometimes being and working with others can really enhance my energy levels, but I seem to quickly hit a point where I just want to run in my room, lock the door, and crank my computer surround sound up to be left alone for a good long time. I kind of go back and forth between the two, as I'm very introverted but not shy in the slightest.
Edit: as an example, I've been this way since I was a kid. I'd be really excited to have a friend come and spend a friday night with me, we'd play all night and all day the next day, but by that next evening, I usually couldn't wait for them to go home (I never, ever wanted anyone to spend a whole weekend with me. Sunday was my day to have to suffer through church with my Mom, and then have the whole rest of the day to myself alone) so I could focus on something by myself.
Another edit: Obviously I have no intention or desire of ever getting married. The idea of fully living and sharing with someone is horrifying to me.