I have to disagree strongly here!
cdn2wheeler, you have no idea why she behaves the way she behaves, why do you immediately think of some dark power games and her using him?? Obviously you've had bad experiences with women in the past, but that's not a reason for projecting this on every woman and every relationship! That's your reality. There are PLENTY of reasons why she could behave like this, why do you automatically assume that such a worst case is true?
I personally cannot imagine at all that someone would go out with someone else to get a free meal (!?!
). Especially in the Netherlands. You don't even know if Jim invited her. That the man invites the woman is not automatically the case here in Europe you know. This explanation just seems totally ridiculous in my eyes.
I don't know why she did it, I'm not in her head and I know too little about the situation. Maybe you're right, it was about power and free meals. But maybe she just wasn't clear about her feelings and needed more time before something could happen?
Or maybe she didn't want a relationship with Jim, but she wanted them to be friends because he's such a great guy and she likes him a lot? Or she was attracted to him and gave him some signs subconsciously, but for some personal reason doesn't want a relationship now? It's hard to stop seeing someone just because you know it doesn't make sense when you're attracted to him, or when you really like him so much and it's just too bad he wants more than you! Maybe she hoped that Jim would get used to the idea that they are just friends and stop wanting more after a while.
Something else: are you sure it was romantic dating for her? Maybe in her eyes it was "going out with a friend".
Jim, is that the same girl as the one you promised to be just friends with?
edit: I burnt my pizza over this post...