[JimOfferman]

Originally Posted by NotesMaeve

See? There's a reason I'm too hungover to do anything than order pizza and surf the 'net. NotesMaeve: Now with Perspective!

LOL!

Jim, I'm so off the market right now, but you're a hottie. You're really funny, insightful, cool, and if I were a single woman in the Netherlands, yeah, I'd so go for it.

Ahw, jeesh, thanks! *blush*
You just totally made my morning there
I like you too dear, in a friendly kind of way

This chick? Not the one.

Have to agree there. Although she was very beautiful and funny. I was gonna say smart also, but that was before she skipped out on the chance to be with me.

Anyway, she is in the past now... on to a brighter future!

I think part of what makes a soul mate a soul mate is the things that you see in the other person and that they see in you that aren't easily seen by others or that aren't even capable of being vocalized. And when you know that's in front of you, what sane person wants anything else?

That's exactly what I felt on the first couple of dates. In fact, back then, I was all but certain that we would end up together, from the smooth ways things were going. But I guess we were meant to only go so far on this.

Originally Posted by cdn2wheeler

Two reasons:

Yeah, those are two very understandable reasons. Both are incongruent with how I am, but I can see why people would use those as motivations to keep going on dates.

My musical friend, unless you're already in a deep, trusting and meaningful relationship with a woman, never under any circumstances whatsoever, share feelings like that. There's a world of difference between what they say and what they mean when women say, "I want someone who's not afraid of sharing their feelings with me." It causes a fundamental unbalancing of the relationship dynamic, and the result is exactly what you've experienced: a huge power shift away from you and towards her.

It actually felt more like me using my power over our relationship to force a decision out of her. I could have continued dating with her, hoping that a more oppertune moment for romance would present itself on the next or the one after or the one after that. But that wasn't what I wanted. I really needed a yes or no answer and I needed it now.

Of course, I would have rather had that she answered yes, but she didn't and that is her loss, not mine.

Plus I like being considered hot for being emotionally honest!

Quite simply, she's playing power games with you. Have none of it. Drop her like a hot potato at a maggot festival.

Yeah, the game really is over on this one.

Jim.