Quote:
Originally Posted by JimOfferman  One thing she said puzzles me a bit. She told me that when we went on dates, I was always expecting something to happen (which was true), but she didn't want that (or at least not anymore).
Why then would she still go on dates with me? When you know that someone is enamored with you and is looking to find a relationship, but you are not open to letting that happen, what good can come out of it? You're just setting everybody up to get hurt. Beats me why you'd want to do that... |
Two reasons:
- You're an ego boost for her. You wanted something she had the power to provide or deny. She denied it, boosting her own power and subtracting some from you.
- She gets to go out on your dime, have a free meal, movie (or whatever) and she's already made it clear that you and she aren't going any further. She's using you, my friend (spoken from someone who's been used more often than I care to admit).
Quote:
Originally Posted by JimOfferman I made quite clear verbally how I felt and what I wanted |
My musical friend, unless you're already in a deep, trusting and meaningful relationship with a woman, never under any circumstances whatsoever, share feelings like that. There's a world of difference between what they say and what they mean when women say, "I want someone who's not afraid of sharing their feelings with me." It causes a fundamental unbalancing of the relationship dynamic, and the result is exactly what you've experienced: a huge power shift away from you and towards her.
Quite simply, she's playing power games with you. Have none of it. Drop her like a hot potato at a maggot festival.