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My problem is that I find almost all of the advice working like a shirt. Either you get a shirt that is in size 50 or size 34, never the size you have which might be 42. When this is said I feel like some advice is so general that it do not help me, or too small that it miss the point or just fill in 20% of what I need.
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Then you make your own shirt out of the raw materials given. Seriously, what you should do is kind of like "salvage" the bits of wisdom that apply in each piece of advice. Most of it might not apply, but there are probably small pieces in every cliche piece of advice that can actually help you and that you need to hold on to.
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How shall I conquer this? How shall I make myself feel much more powerfull in myself so I can say no to advice I do not like and thank you to the advice I like, becoming more thankfull but at the same time not lame and going into the direction I always end up with. Trying out the advice and left with a feeling it is not me, but them who do want me to be like that? (Sometimes I fear so much that I need to be everything everyone is telling me to be that I end up giving up myself). How can I find strengh to get them to understand that I need time to think about it, and that it is ok to not give me advice all the time. Since I feel so tired when they try to give me advice.
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If someone offers you advice when you obviously are asking for it, be very polite at first. You asked for it, even if it's not advice you like. Tell them that you think it might not work, but don't be rude about it. It can be frustrating to people that are really trying to help you to have their advice rejected completely.
If someone gives you advice without you soliciting it, this is probably a big communication issue between the two of you. Some people really don't want to be given advice sometimes. Let them know that if it happens.