If you can realize that your father lived up to the purpose he chose for his life, and that he lost nothing by dieing, then you may no longer be miserable and feeling as if you lost the right to see your father accomplish what he would be able to accomplish were he still alive. Remember, emotions aren't a goal, they are just a reaction. So I would recommend that you stop trying to cry and start trying to understand why you need to cry. I can't promise that this will work for you, I personally haven't had a close family member die in a very long time, but I believe that it will help.
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