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Originally Posted by lemon  Hey everyone,
I'm wondering how all of you overcome feelings of loneliness...
It's one of the hardest things for me.. i HATE being alone.. i'm away from my husband for a couple weeks for a work trip... and i just am SO overcome with feelings of sadness and anxiety... i try to get out and do things to keep myself busy but i can't sleep or anything when i get back to my hotel.. i just feel so sad...
any suggestions?
How come i can't stand being alone?? |
You can't stand being alone because your nervous system / brain gets HUNGRY to be with other people, it gives you positive feelings and "refreshes" you, and when you are alone your brain and nervous system "punish you", if you want to learn how to deal with loneliness you have to train.
i.e. purposely disconnect from everyone for a while and find solitary interests that you can pursue. Reading great books and biographies of people who've lived "lonely" lives is probably the one place to look on how they adjusted to it. It's really just a matter of will power, after a while your nervous system will adjust, you have to really penetrate the whole "cultural group mind"
And create a whole independent system of values outside of what society or other people tell you and never let go of them. The reason why many people feel lonely is because many times they are still trying to judge their worth and self by other people perspectives, values and views. You got to just chuck them out.
Just imagine, if everyone died tomorrow except you and one member of the opposite sex you didn't know, and you were spread far apart from one another and had to find one another you'd have to find a way to cope with loneliness until you found that person to continue the human race.
Try finding biographies of men and women who've been incarcerated or in solitary confinement for a long time, they usually do a lot to ease feelings of loneliness because really... we take WAY too much for granted.