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Originally Posted by Ree  If she's been hurt very badly, she may be done with relationships and you might have to accept that. Time may help her get over the pain from the past. The fact that you've been a good friend and haven't made any demands on her relationship-wise is certainly in your favor. However, if you truly care about her, you naturally want the very best for her. That might mean that you'll only have her in your life as a friend.
As an aside, I hope she realizes how incredibly fortunate she is to have such a good friend as you. Please don't under estimate how important you are to her and her children. No doubt you've made a very valuable contribution to this family and that's a good thing. |
Thanks, all, for the responses.
I have been a good friend to her and to her kids, but I want to be clear about something: I didn't become her friend and support because I wanted something more. I became her friend and support because she, and especially the kids, needed it.
As time passed, my feelings grew deeper and more meaningful, and almost simultaneously I started learning a bit about this whole Law of Attraction. (Coincidence? I'll leave that up to you to decide.)
But here's the thing: To put these feelings back under wraps, to bury them because I'll just "be a friend" and nothing more, is heartwrenching and bewildering.
There is, frankly, no greater insult for a man to hear from a woman he's romantically interested in than the "I like you as a friend" or "let's just be friends" speech. It essentially boils down to, "You're second-rate. You might get some of my attention, and only on my terms, but you won't get any of my feelings." It's a monumental slap in the face, a complete and total rejection of who he is as a man.