Originally Posted by Xin
The few good things I got from girls didn't even sprout from focusing on them - they were just natural extensions of a mindset I had.
Xin, you might find you're more attractive to women if you be the kind of person you'd like to attract -- if you're thinking about what you want to add to a relationship, as opposed to what you'll "get".
I think you're right to focus on living a life that you love, and allowing the right girls to be swept up into the vortex of the good time you're having.
However, you would be wise to let go of your old pain around this issue, because this kind of thinking is a pretty effective girl-repellant:
...getting to see most girls are not like the hype tells us they are, and realizing most relationships are just a cage, I eventually got bored of trying to get something not really benefitial...
Loosen your hold on your negative thoughts around women, nurture your thoughts of appreciation and gratitude, and make sure you are having a ton of fun. You will be a magnet to great, sexy, positive, fun women!