[NotesMaeve]

Originally Posted by BEN HUTSON

Greetings people, I'm happy that i have found this forum.

We're glad you found us! (I'm fond of Bens! Yay!)

I've always had this ongoing problem of introversion. since mid teen years I've seemed to cast myself away from social groups, or when participating in social conversation, and i hear people talking i have nothing constructive to say, unless I'm knowledgeable of whatever they are talking about, which seems to be this way in many peoples cases, whether its small talk from the less knowledgeable, or big talk (back to back interest). I'm not sure if there were any past occurrences or turning points in my life that coulda brought this on me, and its not really a problem of feeling lonely, its more of a problem wanting to verbally express myself. I'm not really introverted when I'm around my couple of friends, that I've grown up with, who i share interests with, but when I'm around my older brother, I'm totally introvert . i think its because he is more intelligent than me, because when we're talking I'm usually in "passive" mode the whole time, it feels like a defense mechanism that switches on so i dont sound stupid if i say something outta context, he lectures me about a lot of things that i read about on the internet, religion, spirituality, how the world works, government, etc... i feel as if I'm a smart person myself, because I'm able to express my research and findings to my friends , but its just totally different when I'm around my brother. Whenever we're riding, or sitting and chatting,i want to deeply accommodate the social response but i find myself mentally scrambling for things to say, and usually I'm like " yea" " thats true man"... "yeea" after each statement.. We hardly don't hang around much but we're still close.. Hes 28, and I'm 21.. I'm just so amazed at how intelligent and articulate he sounds when he speaks.. Hes a funny guy, and we went out las night because i wanted to get out the house,we were going to a little club area, but heh, iforgot my i.d.

You mean you're shy. Introversion has nothing to do with being shy. I am a SUPER introvert. All this means is most of my focuses are inward, as opposed to being focused on external things, as in being an extrovert. I am totally my number one priority and have a very rich internal world, and am more interested in the feelings and thoughts I derive from external reality than the external reality itself.

Older siblings lecture. It's the nature of the beast. I'm the baby of three and I get it from two big brothers. Of course, I am quick to remind them: When's the last time YOU asked Mom and Dad for money versus the last time I asked? If you want to feel better about your position in your family, become more successful than your brother.

The whole time we were driving he was talking about the psychology of men and women, and why we're attracted to one another** went much deeper than that** Prior to us going out thats a subject i've been researching for a while, and I've came to my conclusions as well, but i just found myself saying "yea" "thats true man"... after every statement.. i was just sitting there very quietly since he doesn't have a radio, and he says " COME ON MAN!! GET HYPE WE'RE GOIN' OUT TONITE!" all i did was nod my head and smiled, but i really wanted to shout out tooo.. i feel like i offend him when i don't say anything, and i think its sad. I slept over his house after we got back, and just sat on the couch the whole time, I'M REALLY NOT SURE WHY.. he would come around and say a degree of things, like regular chat, and i may say a sentence to compliment what he said, and thats it. I feel like empty luggage when i'm around him because i have nothing to contribute,or rather, i don't know what topics to bring up .

So do you just have nothing to add or are you afraid of looking stupid?

I've come to a conclusion that maybe the reason why I'm introverted around him is because sub consciously i fear his intelligence and whatever i contribute will be of no value...to him during the conversation..Heck, i'm even an introvert on many forums.

Honest question: What do you mean he's smarter than you? Higher IQ? Better test taker?