I found out last night that my dad had died last week Wednesday from a heart attack. The funny thing is that he had cancer but I knew that he was not going to die from that for some bizzare reason.
I won't be able to attend the funeral but never intended to go as it's in another country ... never kept in contact with me much and cut me of more or less from April....Anyways I can 't say that 'm upset of anything, He was not the best dad to put it nicely. I've been trought soooo much crap over the last 5 months not knowing if he was a live or dead.
I this may sound selfish but I am totally relieved that he had passed as it was the not knowing that was worse and was killing me inside.
It's still early days and I my just be feeling numb but I didn't have this feeling when my mother died, so I know I'll be just fine. The only problem now is that his family bros, sisters will be alreadt fighting about money
Aso all in all I don't see his death as a bad thing but he is still my dad at the end of day. Oddly I feel at peace
