being as such that i dont know your entire story, here is my experience with this situation.
I have a good friend who had had a similar experience as you describe. She was young when the met him ( i think she was 5) and what she saw in him, no one else could see.
He was on a bad path as was she. As they grew up, they would disappear from each lives only to try and find each other again.
He was often underground and She thought of him often.. whenever she got really worried about him... he would just know and find her or call her.
I dont think she ever really got over him. She married someone else and has 3 kids. She never told him she got married, but he has not contacted her since.
She is happy for the most part and loves her kids. She thinks of him alot and wonders what happened to him. She is 24 or so now. I certainly hope we have not seen the last of him.
So, why does it matter if he is your soul twin or not? Do you love him? It sounds like you do. What do you mean by he hurts you by not accepting your love?
Regardless of if you love him or if he is your soul twin, you have 2 choices.
1.. cut your losses and move on with the realization he cant or wont be what you need in a romantic partner.
2. realize that in spite of his current actions, you love him and you are willing to do what it takes to be with him.
It sounds like you have alot of history with this person and that you have done alot of thinking.
For people who are very aware as you have stated you are, i would say trust your gut. Perhaps he is here to teach you unconditional love and acceptance and you are here to teach him the same.
You can make this relationship with him whatever you want, you just have to decide and put 100 percent on yourself behind it. If he cant accept your love you have to accept that right now he does not accept it. Once you do that, you can move forward. It sounds like he wants help and cares for you because he has not bailed... it might be his way of making sure you care enough to break down his wall.. because if you love him enough to do that, he might think you love him enough not to hurt him.
If you can tell me what you mean by not being able to accept you love, it might be easier to help...