Originally Posted by Steve Pavlina
Your focus on "getting a girlfriend" may be holding you back. Girlfriends aren't possessions. It's not like you're going to walk up to a female and say, "Gimme you."
Try shifting your focus to becoming a boyfriend. Begin expressing some of the qualities you'd express if you were already a boyfriend, especially towards the women who are already in your life. I'll bet you're repressing many of those qualities because you think you need a girlfriend to express them. But those qualities are probably what will help someone find you attractive in the first place.
For example, if you think you need a girlfriend as an outlet for affection, then try expressing your affection now towards the people who are already in your life.
My eternal problem too. I think it's already a infamous thing here.
I never seen it like that "Trying to become a boyfriend".... sometimes I've thought of behaving like if I already had a girlfriend, what should I change, etc. Needless to say that didn't work...
I too have seen my relationship with my mother and my sister with me as paralel things to a girlfriend or patterns it could matter but even in my most affectous times with them, that hasn't changed a thing with girls.
I mean, even all that may not work. Finding a pair is one of the strangest things in my life, ain't it?, for me the strangest one.
I mean... some people are more skilled in that that others.