Please let me bring up two points.
1. You are all you ever need to be happy, and you should always be happy. Think about unhappiness/obsession/desire as a signal for you to grow and strengthen who you are. If you are not happy with yourself, you cannot be happy with anyone. I do not know if it is any comfort, but I think even if you got with this girl, unhappiness would have followed.
2. Breathe in deep, very deep from your stomach while you do this: Now, every time you have an obsessive thought, or think about this girl, do not resist the thought, let it sit in your mind and feelings, try to look at yourself having these feelings from "the outside" and think of reasons why you have to daydream, why you "need" this person in your life?
What you find will be personal, but examples might be:
1. You always have to have what you want, otherwise you have failed. (False just let life be in its own way, the fate of every wave in the ocean is loss, but there is always another one there to replace it, why think of the wave that got away?)
2. You need to be needed in order to feel like a perfect person. (False you are perfect even if no one needs you)
Take the whole excersize as a chance to grow and discover something new about yourself, this is because all you unhappiness revolves around you and your thoughts. You can control exactly how happy you are at any moment. It might take a few days or months, but keep it up, once you have it, you have it, and you will be a more complete person for it. Self knowledge is strength! |