What helps me (and is perhaps the first step to the place Steve describes) is to simply acknowledge my emotions on an intellectual level when I notice the big ones--usually anger or frustration. By simply saying (out loud) "wow, I'm feeling really angry right now" I can usually distance myself from the emotion enough to explore where it came from and then decide how I choose to respond (rather than react) Before I began this practice I would get caught up in the emotion, or deny the emotion--either way I lost a lot of control--it almost felt like was drowning.
Acknowledging the emotion and "studying" it certainly doesn't make it go away (and I wouldn't want it to) but it does allow the emotion to be a tool for growth rather than a rock in the path. |