Originally Posted by nistacular
Well I agree with you. It's just an inevitability that things in groups of people that you don't know are going to be superficial... yeah
However I'll add that most families have a few specific activities or topics of discussion that really brings them together, because everyone enjoys doing it (usually for the sake of togetherness - but that feels good). If these people really matter to you, then you should speak up about what you really care about, and you can judge their following reactions... either that or find a close group of other people in which to talk about what really matters to you... I'm learning (at least this applies to my family) that even families don't have to know every fiber of your existence --- sometimes I wish they did, so they could be an immortal pillar of support throughout my life, but that's not the case with me anymore.
I'm interested in what you're saying. You've raised some questions for me. e.g:
Do these people really matter to me?
If they do matter, in some relevant important way, why should I speak up?
And now your getting me to the point of one thing that's really bothering me lately. I think I do kind of long for another to know every fiber of my existence, as you put it. And also to have that immortal pillar of support. I want to be able to say or do anything to somebody and not be rejected by them. I want someone who really will be there through thick and thin.
What I'm seeing at the moment is that there is no one like this in my life. I know I am asking a lot and if you were to ask me if I would reciprocate these thinhs I'd probably say 'no'. But this just seems to leave a world full of individuals who will not go beyond their self-interest when it comes down to it. Such a world feels lacking to me in some way.
In this context, I admire something like a suicide pact where two people give themselves completely to the other in the ultimate way. Perhaps not the best example but it gets at the magnitude of what I'm talking about.