Originally Posted by DerekB
I'm turning twenty years old next month. I've never had sex, kissed a girl, been on a date, or even held hands with a girl.
Somehow when I read that first line I realized you were either an INTJ or an ENTJ who is struggling with relationships and that a long story was to follow.
Well as an INTJ I can tell you my perspective on this.
If you go out to a club then you can for instance right away make an assumption that 30% of people there are completely non compatible with you (ugly, dumb, unavailable etc.), 30% of people are not your type, 30% are your type but wouldn't have sex with you - and 10% are the ones that you have a good chance bedding - sexually compatible, emotionally available and generally looking for GUYS JUST LIKE YOU.
So all you have to do is find these 10%.
How do you find them? You have to probe the field. When you are in a club - APPROACH people. Talk to people and try to reach out. No connection - then just approach someone else - and so on. Once you hit upon a person who is available and perfect then you two will absolutely find a way..
The hardest thing seems to be the approach part and here I have a very good piece of advice for you that will make your approaches a lot easier.
There are two parts to the approach. One: approach is simple when you OFFER things to the other person. Two: you have to ask questions and let them show you what they want, so that you can figure out what to offer them in the first place.
These are two parts to a single whole - when you don't find out what they might like being offered then you will most likely hit it wrong and get rejected - and if you forget to "offer" first, then it's really hard to get something from them.
But if you can offer them something first, they would be far more inclined to give things to you in return.
As for the sex thing, offering works best with physical contact - not with words. When you offer a girl sex, you touch her and get her excited about it - then you kiss her. If she wants what you are offering then she will respond by kissing you back - maybe even grab you with her both hands and kiss you wildly.
But you have to offer her an opportunity first - and the start to that is approaching her and figuring out for yourself what she is looking for.