[Indiana]

Originally Posted by Acting Like Godot

What does a custodian do?

A custodian takes care of things. A custodian looks after things that other people do not take care of. He cleans up other people's messes. He keeps watch. Another name would be Guardian.

MyLifeSucks, in the very first line of your post, you said something that wasn't true. You said:

I've not accomplished one thing in my 38y/o on earth.

But right after that, you tell us you have, in fact, done many admirable things in spite of very difficult circumstances.

You went to college.

I did mange to go to college in spite of dropping out of school in the 8th grade and getting my GED.

You recognised when you were struggling, and sought help - and were assured that you were more capable than you believed.

I did seek professional help twice and on both occassions, the end results where" I am a normal person", at least that's what the professionals told me.

You were able to secure many different jobs, even if you didn't find they fulfilled you.

I job hopped for years.

You maintained your ethical integrity and looked after yourself.

I lived in shelters, slept in cars and I still manged to not go down the path of crime and drugs. I don't even "drink".

You held onto your dreams. You did not consign them to the past, but kept a place for them in your future.

I know deep in my heart I have do a lot of wonderful things.

What are those things? Please - tell us. Give some voice to them. Honour them by believing in them enough to share them with other people who just might be able to help you with them.

You are a custodian in your job, but don't forget that you are a custodian of yourself and you are a custodian of your dreams, too. That is why you are still hanging in here despite all the things you have endured. That's why you posted here. You're reaching out, and when you reach out, you give other people the chance to help you. You create possibility.

Keep taking care of yourself, MyLifeSucks. Keep cleaning up those messes other people created, and keep looking after the things other people don't look after. You are a unique and precious individual. Nobody has the same dreams as you, and only you can achieve them. But you can tell us how we can help.