I think its sad how guilty I was made to feel while growing up. I thought I was a really terrible person. Then one day I learned over 90% of men masturbate that was a suprising thing for me to learn. It changed my perspective a bit.
i also thinks it's sad that religious dogma is SO based upon shame and blame, and the 'only way out' (according to the propaganda) is to "obey" 'their' rules. again, here is a system which is based upon framing adult human beings as inferior, "bad little children". it's sickening to me that so many people are so willing to buy into this, and believe that they are inherently 'bad', that natural human behaviors are 'sinful' or wrong, and they must grovel and beg to get 'redemption' (aka the approval of the 'superior' authority figure - who is also just a human being) (i call 'emperor has no clothes' on worshiping other human beings as 'god') - to be considered worthy human beings.
it's no WONDER so many people have a fundamental belief that they're "not good enough". This is what organized religion has turned us into. what a waste of life....
i applaud you for looking beyond that, and for seeing that there's freedom and value in a life well-lived outside of narrow dogmatic beliefs.