Depression sucks and it seems there's no way out. And three years is a long time. Why do people get depressed? Do you think alligators or birds get depressed?
I think what you need is a mission (I sound like the Wizard of Oz here). Try taking a class in vipassana meditation. First you might just need to calm the monkey mind, flitting from this to that. Your mind is jumping around from one not-real event to another or is self absorbed in your ME. You might want to get away from your YOU for awhile. But not on a permanent basis (suicide). sometimes we just get stuck. Slow down, get off the track and just feel now, without the rest of your...stuff. My friend has a saying...it's sh*t, but it's my sh*t. |