I have now read the various posts of this thread. I keep asking myself one question: what about the obvious? What about the purple elephant that stands in the living room?
Simply put, I ask: to where do you want to relocate? Anyone can come up with money, if their heart is in it. Anyone can please a bank, if their heart is in it. Anyone can make any
thing work, if their heart is in it. I just get the impression that your subconscious mind and the Universe are conspiring to give you a better scenario--literally a better scenario, as in scene, location, another place.
It's one thing for people to try to guilt-trip you into believing that something you are doing or not doing doesn't measure up to the LoA or what you "need" to be doing. However, my take is far simpler. My take is that you (i.e.
, your higher self) know exactly
what you are doing--all too well!
That is to say, it's time for you to move out.
So what about walking away from the house? The bank would be crazy not to allow you to do a "short sale." If you walked away from the house, what would you do? Where would you go? What would your life be like? I think the Universe is telling you to consider such a possibility. This may or may not be one of those situations where "your troubles follow you when you leave, if you don't learn the lessons facing you, by staying." But who cares? It might just be that you have manifested an outcome that you no longer want. Given that you are a responsible person, the Universe may have a hard time "knocking you over your head" to wake you up, to realize "this is not what I want."
Please let me give you an example, which does not assume that the facts of my story apply to you in your situation. There was a time in my life that I was a starving waiter in California. I was supposed to be focusing on my screenplay writing and my playwriting. Was I? Not to my optimal standard, no. Why? Because I was caught up in my poverty. I was so unhappy waiting tables--it just wasn't
me. I felt shame all the time for being so unable to provide for myself in a meaningful way. I was always one step ahead of eviction. But I was a good waiter. Long story short--I made inquiries into becoming a court reporter, which required that I go to court reporting school in the day and work nights at the restaurant. That wasn't going to happen, as a waiter/waitress' lunch-dinner-shift schedules switched every 2 weeks, and the managers wielded too much power in shifting everyone's schedule (keeping them insecure and humble), to allow me to have a clear shot at all-dinner-shift schedules. No, they were going to give me lunches and dinners like the rest, and I would not be able to go to court reporting school, without some clever change in approach.
Out of "nowhere" I got fired from that job because of my mediocre performance as a waiter on a "secret shopper" report one very busy Sunday, when the staff was prematurely sent home, and I was left working three sections of the restaurant, which nobody could adequately cover, not even I. The bottom line: this "forced" me to go to paralegal school, because I couldn't "afford" to go to court-reporting school. Yet, in time, working at law firms as a paralegal cured my insecurity about going to law school, which I did, which has now led me to a much happier life, as an attorney. From this perspective, nearly 20 years later, I am completing my screenplays and my 30-year musical. The place where I write now is a place of joy and abundance, not suffering and starvation, as it was before.
I wondered in astonishment, years later, that if it were not for the Universe forcing my hand in going to law school, I never would have. The point is that responsible folks who "play by the rules" often never wake up out of their "normal" framework, to see that inspiration, oddness, and risk continuously knock at their doors, inviting them to try big life-changes--for the better, even though leaving the bounds of "normalcy" might look scary at the time. So the our unconscious minds, in loving cooperation with the Universe, set up situations that force us out of a situation that we are too stubborn to leave on our own. My stubbornness was staying in poverty in the situation I was in. Thank God the Universe kicked my ass!
I'm in a much better place now.
So when I read your post, I scratched my head and wondered--perhaps the Universe wants you to move out? I could be wrong, of course. But the thought kept playing in my mind, and I wanted to express my thought to you.
Either way, from the perspective of the future, it all worked out beautifully for you! Peace and love!