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Originally Posted by rikun  I'm pretty authentic with people, sometimes they get shocked cause I say something someone might label as inappropriate. ...I feel some anxiety whenever I'm around people. ...I guess in a sense I care a little bit what others think of me. ...I somehow feed of the energy of other people around me.
My anxiety causes me to stiffen up and therefore I can't really be the hilarious me, that wants to get out. But I'm still more extreme and politically incorrect than most people! Maybe I'm afraid of what might happen when I'd free my real self in a public place around people 
The problem for me with "mind like water" is that's it's just impossible. I think too much, I always want to improve everything, I want to do everything and generally I'm really bad at just "having fun, chilling, relaxing or taking it easy". I also have trouble sleeping cause and I can't "turn my head off". Now, I've done some reading and I'm going to see a psychiatric to check me out. I've always thought that thinking like this is normal, but I'm not so sure anymore. You could say that I'm almost neurotic about some things. |
You sound very much like I was a decade ago. The anxiety, saying things that some see as inappropriate, being influenced by the emotional state of others, thoughts running wild, problems sleeping (constant colds too).
Those are common for people with shy, nervous or introverted tendencies. Lack of, or poor social interaction does lead to mental and physical health issues.
The good news is that you can do something about it. I'm sure the psychiatrist can help, but what worked for me was to just do the things I wanted to do, and keep meeting people while doing it till I found people I liked, and start doing things with them that I wanted to do. Many of them were far more politically incorrect than I'd ever dreamed, and while some found that annoying, most of the time it was hilarious. Good times. And good luck to you!