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Originally Posted by ethereal  This comes from the ego's illusion that it has to want something in order to get it, and it is the wantingness that gets it for you. The truth is completely the opposite -- in fact, LoA and IM supporters would probably say, your wantingness is intending lack and attracting lack, and pushes it further away! The ego believes that if it surrenders the desire, then it won't get the happiness associated with fulfilling it. But in fact, by surrendering everything, we get to increasing levels of freedom, love, and happiness that doesn't depend on outside circumstances. The happiness that we projected onto the fulfillment of desire, is now permanently experienced within you at all times as your LOC (level of consciousness), as your way of life and being in the world, and you realize that it never depended on outside circumstances at all. |
This is an excellent point!
I also like this quote from Dharma:
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Originally Posted by Dharma When you feel that uncomfortable feeling inside, just stay with it. "Yup, I feel really uncomfortable now and I'm not going to let my mind run away in a big story". And just be uncomfortable. See what's under the uncomfortable. |
I feel like I am over the crush now, and stopping to observe my thoughts, and ask "Why, really why? Do I feel so much anxiety now? Why do I care if she walks through the door or not?" and then trying to see what answer I got is what really helped me. I think the answer will be different for everyone.
Anyway, I did this for two days and then realized that what was behind it all was that I would feel pressure to BE the perfect person at that time. The whole time I was obsessing with how I would act. Then I would stress that it would not be the right way. Once I realized this, I decided to accept myself for however I acted, that I didn't need to be perfect, and all the bad feelings and obsessions went away. It seems unrelated, but my crush was really about ME! I wanted to create a person that would support me, and my ideal version of myself. (Hey they don't call it egoic delusion for nothing)
What I can attest to is that observing your thoughts and feelings is powerful, and is the way out of a crush in my opinion. The whole thing has to do with you, probably some insecurity, and not the other person.
Look at it as an opportunity to find that thing out, and end it!