Originally Posted by ButterflyWoman
Jerry was quite a lot older than Esther. As she related, he told her when they first hooked up that he was likely to die before she did. It sounds like he pretty much expected it, and so did she. As for his death... It sounds like it was actually pretty quick as these things go. It wasn't a long, lingering, agonising death like some people experience. He escaped the sometimes horrible side effects of the chemotherapy. He had enough time to put all of his affairs in order and say goodbye to everyone he would have wanted to farewell. People who loved him had time to prepare for his death, so it wasn't a sudden shock. Perhaps that's how he wanted it? Not the specifics, necessarily, but maybe he wanted some advance notice and prep time and so on. A lot of people would prefer that to a sudden, unexpected, immediate death.
This is what I was thinking too. While the whole idea of just cutting out one one night, out of the blue, in your sleep works very well for the one making their transition, it often leaves those left behind dealing with a level of shock and resultant grief that is softened somewhat when they instead have a bit of notice of what will be occurring.
To have a bit of advanced knowing gives all parties, the one making their transition included, some time to say goodbye and to adjust to the idea of what will be occurring.
I can only imagine that in light of what appears to be a very close and intimate relationship, that Jerry's brief illness prior to death provided this period of adjustment for Esther and all involved.
Something like an brief illness following a death need not indicate anything contrary to what was planned. Abraham regularly says; The universe has it planned out even better than what you can imagine...and it's the 'essence' of your desire that counts.
Can't help but think here, perhaps the 'essence' of what they were both wanting was indeed fulfilled rather than the exact 'picture' they'd been envisioning of their latter days together.
The essence of our desires is an interesting angle to examine when it comes to all of this, as when you break down a desire into its components and 'reasons' for it, it can often be seen that there are many avenues to its realization that do not necessarily rely upon the manifestation of the 'exact' picture one might have had in mind.