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Originally Posted by Lauxa  Hi Angela,
I was just wondering... what happens if you do have cravings and a desire to drink after a while of being on this program? Do you try and ask yourself what you are expecting to get out of that drink and then go ahead and have it to see if it measures up to what you were expecting? Or would that be a failure of the program...
If the goal is not just to be free of the drink but also to be free of the cravings, is there any advice on what to do if the cravings return? |
Hi, Lauxa. There's a lot to getting this program, as I mentioned in my post to MaxOr, but one of the things I found valuable is that it's not ME who craves alcohol, it is the "Little Monster" that is created when you start drinking. My job now is to starve the little monster, to revel in its death, and not to mourn the death of my enemy. The writer did a great job of showing me how to let go of my
identification with any cravings I might have (so far I haven't had any, but again, it's been a very short time). Too, he says that as the Little Monster dies, the cravings die out, too, only to be revived if I delusionally believe that I could ever control alcohol.
Carr does warn that one thing that usually happens is that I'll probably forget that I've quit, since a lot of my drinking is habitual -- you know, a cocktail on Friday night to relax after a long week, a glass of great red wine with an Italian meal, my proverbial cold beer on a hot August day. So, I intend to remain as alert to the possibility of going unconscious and "accidentally" succumbing to one of these little, apparently harmless, habits.
The other thing is that Danger Man is not ready to stop drinking, although he is excited about reading the book. He knows he would be better off if he stopped completely because he sees the folly of "moderation"; but like me and most people, the idea of never having another drink fills him with dread.
We have been talking about the impact we'll have to watch for in our relationship, cuz we both want this to work but we recognize that we'll be faced with challenges. It's like a mixed marriage!