Originally Posted by elucidate
I'm a bit confused here.
Did you decide "no" because he didn't pay for the bill outright?
He may have wanted to be sensitive to you being an independant woman? Many women don't like the man to pay and insist on paying half.
I guess I just don't understand why you would decide there and then that he was wrong for you , even though you get along on some levels and he's smart and handsome and all these good things, and then this one thing he did which may not have met your expectations, gets your exit pass?
Originally Posted by pyrogen
I wouldn't assume anything based on the first date. Like elucidate said, maybe he thinks he is being polite.
That was written a while ago
What I meant was not that if he doesnt pay he passes. No way!
Its just that there are certain nuances in the dating game that speak louder then words. In NYC usually if a guy splits the bill with you first time you go out it often means he's not interested romantically- or he is just cheap.
Any way not a good sign. It was just an indication to me that theres something up bc he didnt seem cheap.
But I was really into this guy and I asked him out again: (see quote below from a few days later.), and my intuition was right. he split the bill bc he had a gf and didnt see it as a "date", but just as friendship meeting. Why did he ask me out? I guess bc we are in the same line of work and just wanted to make new friends.
Heres the entry about him from a few days after (he is guy C):
I asked guy C, the one Im really interested in to come see Guy M's performance. (Guy C is the handsome man from my post on: 09-06-2011 who I wasnt sure if he was single even though we went out on a date) To my surprise Guy C immediately responded that he'd love to join me (even though I asked at 4pm and the show was at 7pm). |
And it was very fun. Afterwards we went out for a drink, and he began... "you know last time we went out it was kinda weird because it felt like a date......and well I have a girlfriend you know..."
me: " um yes, well I didnt know that..."
you never mentioned that...
But funnily enough right after he said that it was like a big brick wall that had been standing between us, fell. Suddenly the conversation went from our common interests to deep and intimate- we spoke of our desire to have kids, ideas about marriage and alternative ceremonies. past relationships, fears, hopes, repeated patterns we are trying to overcome....
Plus hes pretty funny and I havent laughed so much in ages!
But- Like I said he has a gf. Shes in another country and theyve only been together for 3 months, but Im backing off completely. Not even gonna think about this guy anymore.