[Boreas]

Originally Posted by Red Willow

I noticed that many of my friends around our age (25 ish) were having the same dilemma. I love him/her, but I don't feel "in love."

I feel like it's because when you're younger, high school and college age, everything is so much more intense (Johnny from Algebra is my soulmate!!!! ) And then you go through that a couple times and you start noticing it just doesn't really happen just like that anymore.

I also think that we've seen so many images of what "good" or "ideal" relationships are like--in movies, tv shows, etc...--that we have lost the ability to have free, unrehearsed organic relationships. E.g. because my relationship doesn't look like something starring Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks, it must be flawed.

I feel like so many people are making themselves so unhappy by pursuing this myth of perfect soulmate love. What you need to be looking for is a person who makes you feel good about your life, a person who can help you create real value.

I'm 25 and couldn't agree with this more! Thanks for writing it.