Archive for October 2013

How to Earn Straight A’s

When I started high school, I decided I was going to become a straight-A student, even though I’d never done that before. It seemed like an interesting goal to pursue as a 14-year old. Since school was the center of my life back then, I figured I might as well succeed at it. On my…

You Don’t Need to Overcome Approach Anxiety

Many people use the label approach anxiety to describe the fear of starting a conversation with someone new. This is a common fear, and many people identify it as a stumbling block that supposedly prevents them from enjoying a rich and abundant social life. The truth is that working on overcoming “approach anxiety” is largely…

D/s Play vs. Fairness and Equality

After posting my previous article about D/s Play, which many readers seemed to enjoy, someone asked about the point of playing the roles of the Dominant and the submissive. Why do this sort of thing? I think there are some other questions behind this question too: Aren’t fairness and equality in relationships much more sensible?…

D/s Play

Many of us live in a repressed world. We don’t feel safe enough to share our truest, deepest desires with each other. We keep certain fantasies strictly to ourselves, hiding them where no one else is allowed to look. These desires are not allowed into the light — they’re our secret shame, our darkness denied.…