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You Know You Are a Raw Foodist When…

… your microwave oven has been converted into a sprout and herb garden.

… you can’t remember the last time you visited the “other side” of the grocery store.

… you measure the time since your last illness in decades.

… you spend more time thinking about digestion than sex.

… you consume your own body weight in less than a month.

… you believe that $5 is a fair price for a 3-oz piece of chocolate.

… you feel confident that you could survive on Gilligan’s Island — and you know you can make a better coconut cream pie than Mary Ann.

… your diet is a combination of the diets of bonobos, cows, and plankton.

… you can identify every item in the produce section.

… the grocery checker has to look up the codes for half of your items; the other half she must ask you to identify.

… you gladly offer to “help out” any friends with fertility problems; they decline because they just want one baby, not a litter.

… you fantasize about a raw foods version of Costco.

… you store produce in your oven.

… you’ve turned down lunch invites for logistical reasons.

… your blender costs more than your car (and has a better warranty).

… you own functional kitchen equipment made of bamboo.

… you weight train by grocery shopping.

… your last remaining addiction is a bean.

… you spell juice fasting with an extra e.

… you don’t believe in pre-detox sex.

… you can make a salad from your backyard, even if you don’t have a garden.

… you know how to cure cancer, heart disease, and diabetes… but no one believes you.

… something in your kitchen is currently underwater.

… you know the difference between raw and really raw when it comes to foods like almonds, tahini, and agave nectar.

… it disturbs you when people start talking about really, really raw.

… you want to try solar gazing soon.

… you refer to the Food Network as the Horror Channel.

… your diet helps restore the hearing you lost from using your blender.

… you call yourself a chef and/or coach even though you’ve never been to school for either.

… you know what Cassandra felt like.

… your first name is an emotion, an adjective, or an insect.

… you shop for clothes in the children’s section.

… your bathroom is devoid of reading material.

… vegans ask you, “But where do you get your protein?” (Some things never change.)

… you qualify potential dating partners based on their level of toxicity.

… your job title begins with the words raw, eco, or alternative.

… your health care practitioner’s job title ends in -path or -ist.

… your crackers cost more than $1 per ounce.

… you meet a breatharian and have to ask, “But where do you get your protein?”

… your breakfast smoothies contain items from six continents, four oceans, and a volcano.

🙂

October 14 - 16, 2016
Las Vegas

At the powerful and transformational Conscious Life Workshop, you'll explore and discover how to make your path with a heart financially sustainable. Learn how to center your life around doing what you love while you generate abundant income from your interests to fuel your desired lifestyle.

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Registration: $597

October 21 - 23, 2016
Las Vegas

The Conscious Entrepreneur Workshop is designed to help you start your own successful business, to make it profitable, and to enjoy what you've created. This workshop blends inspiration and motivation with the practical, how-to details that new entrepreneurs crave.

Learn more...

Registration: $597

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Here are my recommendations for products and services I've reviewed that can improve your results. This is a short list since it only includes my top picks.

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Paraliminals - Condition your mind for positive thinking and success
The Journal - Record your life lessons in a secure private journal
Sedona Method - FREE audios to release your blocks in a few minutes
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