Saving Time With Your Microwave
July 12th, 2005 by Steve Pavlina
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The ubiquitous microwave oven is an appliance used daily, both at work and at home. And yet so few people possess the knowledge and skills necessary to reap the maximum productivity from this modern time-saving device.
Here are several tips for optimal microwave oven usage:
1. Reduce unnecessary key punching.
Are you one of those plebeians who still punches in 1-0-0 to heat an item for a minute or 1-3-0 for a minute and a half? Use 6-0 for 60 seconds and 9-0 for 90 seconds, and save yourself that extra digit. Learn to type two digits for anything up to 99 seconds. You’ll save time and also reduce wear and tear on your keypad.
2. Duplicate the same digit whenever possible.
Tip #1 was for newbies. The next skill to master is digit reuse so as to minimize finger movement over the keypad. Instead of typing 9-0 for 90 seconds, type 8-8. Instead of 6-0, use 5-5. You won’t miss those extra seconds, and you’ll save even more time.
3. If your microwave has a turntable, learn its rotational period.
How many times have you re-nuked your tea only to find that when you opened the microwave door, the teacup handle was oriented towards the rear, forcing you to reach awkwardly around the back to extract your beverage without burning yourself? The time lost in handle-hunting can be an order of magnitude greater than what you save on the keypad, so give top priority to learning the period of rotation of your turntable. When shopping for a new microwave, look for one with a rotational period of 5.5 or 11 seconds, since then your 5-5 and 8-8 nukes will always return the cooked item to its original orientation (i.e. handle facing out). But if you’re stuck with a less functional period of rotation and the handle always ends up facing the rear after your preferred nuke times, then learn to insert the cold mug with the handle facing the rear, so it will be facing outwards post-nuking. Of course, another solution is to buy two-handled mugs or teacups, which is fine if sophistication lacks appeal to you.
4. Multitask with multiple microwaves.
How many times have you had to wait for the microwave to finish one item before you nuke a second or third item, like reheating leftovers and then making a cup of tea? Surely you have better things to do than stand around soaking up radiation for 10 minutes. New microwave ovens can be bought for less than $50. You should have at least three stacked in your kitchen and at least one in every room of your home. Reheat leftovers for the entire family in minutes. Build your own nuke farm, and multi-nuke your way to faster meals for life. Just be sure not to blow a fuse by running too many other appliances at the same time.
By applying these tips, you could save yourself precious seconds per day, which over the course of a lifetime, should be more than enough to recoop the time spent learning them… unless, of course, you’re reading this on your deathbed, in which case you have my sincerest apologies (and my pity).
Next time: Why you should wear a wristwatch on each wrist (what if your non-watch hand happens to be closer to your face???)… PLUS determining optimal coaster placement. 
July 12th, 2005 at 3:13 am
Superb!!
For a while I must admit I failed to see that tongue firmly wedged in your cheek
:clap:
July 12th, 2005 at 4:05 am
Worryingly, I think that these productivity tips will be some of the very few that I’ll actually get my act together and implement. Dear, oh dear…
July 12th, 2005 at 4:10 am
Funny stuff! I’m glad to see you don’t take yourself too seriously.
July 12th, 2005 at 4:11 am
This is a wind-up, isn’t it?
July 12th, 2005 at 4:31 am
Great advice, Steve!
But what about cold food? I suggest setting your home’s thermostat at 40 degrees. Then you can keep your cold foods where you’ll actually use them! No more trips across the kitchen for milk – leave it on the table! Beer goes next to the couch. Cheese stays on the cutting board on the kitchen counter.
And think of the electricity you’ll save without a refrigerator. Especially if you have an older, less efficient one.
July 12th, 2005 at 4:56 am
HA HA HA!!
Really funny!!
Really enjoyed the twist!
July 12th, 2005 at 5:14 am
Dude,
You have way to much time on your hands if you’re concerned about tea cup handle positions in a microwave. You are a brilliant and I enjoy most of your material. And after reading your blog for several months now….I think I know how you will respond to my “peanut gallery” comments.
You are a talented guy and your content can be very enlightening at times. However, when I read this last blog post, I wanted to make a trip to Radio Shack to check out their full line of batteries and buy a variety pack of pocket protectors.
You know that I am just having fun with this Steve….
Peace out
July 12th, 2005 at 5:24 am
A funny idea for timesaving..
but please use your precious time on something else than that wristwatch post. ^^
July 12th, 2005 at 5:34 am
Excellent – this will help me get up at 4:59 instead of 5am. Perhaps I’ll try this in my next 30 day trial. I could heat up my coffee with more disciplined efficiency – but wait, I’ve given up coffee!
Hmmm … maybe I’ve been hanging around here too much
July 12th, 2005 at 5:34 am
Oh, 1st April already?
July 12th, 2005 at 5:52 am
Steve, are you sure that the microwave oven is healthy?
It seems to destroy the vitamins in food. It also may ionize water and create strong oxidants such as H2O2 instead of H2O. Oxidants destroy cells.
July 12th, 2005 at 6:50 am
Funny! Perfect timing for a world that seems to be taking itself all to serious lately. This is a perfect example of what personal development isn’t. It’s not about micromanaging every aspect of your life, it’s about making profound fundamental changes to your concious and subconcious operating system and having the details, like microwave usage, adjust accordingly. I see that some people took this post seriously which makes it all the more entertaining.
July 12th, 2005 at 6:51 am
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July 12th, 2005 at 6:55 am
Nice self-satire! Brian beat me to the punch about lowering the thermostat, although I only intended it so that you could pre-load each microwave the night before, eliminating multiple, redundant trips to the refrigerator!
July 12th, 2005 at 7:11 am
Hi Steve,
don’t you think that you are going overboard with this microwave optimization a little?
If the teacup handle is on the other side, you can always move the turntable to get your cup.
Maybe you could be more productive by putting something inspiring near your microwave, so while you wait for your tea to be ready you can post a list of questions that you could ask yourself for example. My microwave is over the fridge so you can imagine creative space that is waiting to be used.
Now that I think about it, you could put a list of foods that you think it would be nice or good for you to try, so you wouldn’t have same stuff over and over again. Or something else.
What do you think about this?
All best and thanks for other articles here,
Zeljko Dakic
July 12th, 2005 at 7:16 am
time saving
The ubiquitous microwave oven is an appliance used daily, both at work and at home. And yet so few people possess the knowledge and skills necessary to reap the maximum productivity from this modern time-saving device.
July 12th, 2005 at 7:29 am
I have a hard time telling the difference between your serious posts and your humour posts. How many of your other posts were jokes that I missed and thought were serious?
Would you consider making a “Humor” or “JustKidding” tag for those posts?
July 12th, 2005 at 8:08 am
OK, reading the first item, I thought you’d gone round the bend. But only for about five seconds or so. Oh, that was brilliantly funny. I love April Fool’s in July.
July 12th, 2005 at 8:14 am
I’m a Proud Plebian Number Puncher!
Very humorous!
July 12th, 2005 at 8:25 am
Great post Steve. It was so funny I had to add it to by blog story this morning. You actually might have a couple of “Purple Cows” there. I can’t wait to hear about the dual wrist watches…
John
July 12th, 2005 at 8:33 am
nice post =)
July 12th, 2005 at 9:40 am
Just wondering : How come google adSense is not so smart as to display a *single* microwave ad ? Thats a lot of revenue lost for them, google, and you, steve
July 12th, 2005 at 10:08 am
What about the “add 30 seconds” button?
July 12th, 2005 at 10:14 am
The scary part is that I actually am aware of the turntable speed in my microwave for exactly that reason. I’m sure I don’t need to tell you that I’m an engineer! Perhaps I need to lighten up a little? Even when you are having fun you get us thinking.
July 12th, 2005 at 11:04 am
I have to admit that I have no idea if you’re serious or not. If not, I’m betting this was originally a Toastmasters humorous speech. If so, let me add my two cents–some microwaves have a “minute plus” setting that automatically starts the microwave for one minute, with subsequent presses adding a minute onto the time. Makes 90% of nukes a 1-2 push process.
I think people like me would be less annoyed at more button presses if the buttons weren’t so hard to press.
July 12th, 2005 at 6:28 pm
Amateur! Learn to eat frozen food, save even more time … and energy!
July 12th, 2005 at 7:53 pm
[...] og on personal productivity. It’s nice to know he also has a sense of humor… Saving Time With Your Microwave No [...]
July 13th, 2005 at 7:57 am
Putting your tea in a microwave could lead to a heavy jail sentence in the UK!
And don’t even suggest putting your teapot in a microwave…
We take our tea seriously don’t you know?
July 15th, 2005 at 10:22 am
Interesting! Sick! Smartness. I often relate humor with intelligence. I also often said that in every joke there is a bit of truth. Being real or not, it show a perfectionnist side, either in your jokes or your habit.
The only concern I have had recently with microwave is: is it healthly? A load of people are against it. Someone told me that it was basicelly altering the thing we put inside (making its substance unstable) [sorry if I don't sound clear!] Saving 1 week with microwave, but losing 5 years of life. Hrmmm.
July 15th, 2005 at 6:15 pm
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July 21st, 2005 at 12:12 pm
I already do the “put the cup in with the handle facing the rear” trick, for the exact reason above. Well actually, it’s so I don’t burn myself when reaching around.
July 22nd, 2005 at 8:18 am
My wife always yells at me for hitting the add a minute key a few times rather than punching in a number. A) since you don’t have to move your hand around the pad, you save time and B) it starts nuking w/out having to hit start.
July 26th, 2005 at 6:24 am
I have a problem. My microwave has a dial, not a keypad. Help please.
July 31st, 2005 at 3:41 am
Goodness Brendan, fancy using such primitive technology! A dial, bless you. I am sure our expert on the functionality of the microwave oven shall have some advice fore you. Get a new microwave, heck, while your at it get three.
August 2nd, 2005 at 11:17 am
Brendan, while you’re shopping be sure to ask the sales rep the turntable speeds. Would love to see the look on his/her face when you ask him all straight-faced!! I use the m/w a lot and was already reaching for a notepad and pencil to jot down the stuff to do!!!!
Nicely done, Steve. Just reminds some of us, life is not all GTD. Once in awhile, life needs to be lived!
~Memorykeeper