Comments on: Self-Discipline: Acceptance

By: shri

shri — Sun, 10 Jul 2005 13:17:21 +0000

‘A binder sits on my desk with my written goals and detailed plans to achieve them’
Can you give an example of how exactly do you go about this task or tell some thing about goalsetting? Thanks.

By: Vinod Bora

Vinod Bora — Tue, 21 Jun 2005 08:36:40 +0000

Hi Steve,

First of all I would like to thank you for such a nice article. I’m too 35 right now. I too have accomplished many things in life but you know there is still lot to do. For this we need to be Self-Discipline. I don’t have any addiction to any bad habits still I need self discipline to accomplish lot of pending targets.

Thanks again your article has motivated me and shown me the direction.

By: Steve Pavlina

Steve Pavlina — Tue, 07 Jun 2005 18:21:59 +0000

Ali, goals should be based on a consideration of desire and capability. If you base them on desire (need) alone, the goals may be impractical.

Part of self-discipline/acceptance is having the presence of mind to set realistic goals that you have good reason to believe you can execute. There’s little to be gained by setting goals you don’t believe you can accomplish.

By: Ali

Ali — Tue, 07 Jun 2005 16:36:30 +0000

steve,
dude, i know where you are coming from when you talk about setting reasonable goals, but my problem is that i need to make a lot of money, hence i had to set my financial goals for the next 2 years to be big, but i’m probably not capable of accomplishing them yet.

what do you suggest for someone in my situation?

By: Sam

Sam — Tue, 07 Jun 2005 14:50:26 +0000

Excellent article as always. I too have started waking up early every single day including weekends (6AM for now), thanks to your articles. I also have been trying to get in shape for a while but one of your articles hit the nail on the head (you mentioned something along the lines of it not being a priority and thus making excuses for it). So I started biking 8 miles thrice/week and stopped eating as a hobby (nothing else to do? Why not finish up that cake I baked). I have noticed huge differences (pants are not tight anymore and I accomplish lots during the day).

I also enjoy your weight training analogies.

By: Nick H

Nick H — Tue, 07 Jun 2005 11:10:20 +0000

Already enjoying this group of articles. It so refreshing to hear someone say “yes, this may take a long time to achieve”, rather than “read this and you’ll be instantly changed”

Keep up the great work!

By: Russ

Russ — Mon, 06 Jun 2005 23:56:22 +0000

I can’t tell you how much I enjoy your site and this article. I spend untold hours reading it, sometimes compulsively reading the same articles and comments over and over day after day. Once I break that habit I can really start my other goals…

By: Steve Pavlina

Steve Pavlina — Mon, 06 Jun 2005 23:06:51 +0000

@Tim: Most days I go to bed 10-11pm. 10:30pm is typical.

As for getting a good night’s sleep with a newborn, I’ll let you know that once I’ve learned how to raise the dead.

By: Genuine Curiosity

Genuine Curiosity — Mon, 06 Jun 2005 21:58:40 +0000

Sluuurp…

Steve Pavlina’s rockin’ the house on his blog this week. Check out today’s post on self-discipline - bring your thirst …

By: Tim

Tim — Mon, 06 Jun 2005 21:00:43 +0000

Steve: hope you don’t mind me asking, but what time do you go to bed?

Also, do have you any tips for getting a good night’s shut eye with a newborn baby?

Thanks for the blog!

By: Harish Verma

Harish Verma — Mon, 06 Jun 2005 19:13:29 +0000

I have read both this weeks posts on Self discipline. My view , after reading these good sensible thouhts, is that direction is the key. Basic things like planning your day the day or even week before will help to re gain control.

The ability to say no will also help in self discipline.

Brak downs could be forgiven and start again.

Creating zones in your day so that there is rhythm to your day may also help in creating this culture of self determination.

I will put these and your ideas into practise, very exciting to make fundamental change in attitude from confusion of living by the seat of my pants to declaring what my day and priorities will be.

I think scheduling your time investment to your choosen activities will help, since without allocating time ie making appointments with yourself, how can you possibly manage thses activities.

By: Steve Pavlina

Steve Pavlina — Mon, 06 Jun 2005 18:41:32 +0000

@tymada:
Yes, I believe you can suffer from overtraining in the area of self-discipline. Rest is required just as it is in physical training.

This reminds me that I really should plan a vacation.

By: Steve Pavlina

Steve Pavlina — Mon, 06 Jun 2005 18:20:19 +0000

@Rich:
At 20 I wasn’t going to school. I had made a half-hearted attempt at college when I was 18 but was soon expelled — they tend to do that when you don’t show up to class and your GPA starts with the decimal point.

It wasn’t until I was 21 that I made a serious attempt at college, starting again as a freshman. I graduated three semesters later with two degrees (math and computer science) and a 3.94 GPA. Shortly after graduating I started Dexterity Software.

Night and day.

Acceptance helped me tremendously because it showed me that if I fully accepted my reality as it was, I could eventually follow a path to something better, even though it was very distant at the time. I remember saying to myself, “Well, if it takes a few years, it takes a few years.”

By: Charles Martin

Charles Martin — Mon, 06 Jun 2005 18:13:02 +0000

It is very important for everyone to understand that, just like body-building, any discipline takes time and doesn’t happen overnight. Right now I’m at 35 and have many of those goals you have currently reached since the age of 20. It will take several years to get many of those goals “checked off”, but the most frustrating thing many deal with is a lack of patience. It requires a strong desire to succeed, not just because you want to, but because you know you HAVE to. I want to lose weight… if I want to live until I’m 70, I HAVE to lose weight. However, I know it will take a long time to lose what I need to lose. That’s why I’m absorbing this blog and hoping that I can start implementing some personal mental changes in order to proceed with the physical changes.

Thanks for all your work here, Steve.

By: Rich

Rich — Mon, 06 Jun 2005 17:00:10 +0000

At 20 you were directionless, after leaving college early having a killer workload sustained by self-discipline? You must have had an intersting few years around that time. Or, maybe that was before college?